You are beautiful.
Modesty aside I’ve heard these words quite often. Yet most of them have been taken for granted. It’s kind of one of these “you will always be the best person in the world for your mum”. So whenever it comes from the close people or friends it somehow looses its value. So unfair though because they really mean it!
There is always a couple of extra kilos you want to get rid of. Too curly hair. Too little volume. Too skinny. Trouble skin. Different shape of fingers. Big nose. Small ears.
It’s like there is never perfect you.
Some days I love myself more. Some I hate everything about myself and can’t find any clothes that could make me feel pretty. Normally on these days I do shopping. No kidding. Each perfect find gives a little boost of confidence yet it never fixes the real issue. To keep it real, let me share something with you. In the light of recent trends I have been really inspired by many talented bloggers to start my fashion blog. I felt like I can use my Instagram platform and start a blog or even Youtube channel. Nevertheless, if you have followed me on Instagram a year or so ago you would rarely see me on the pictures. Even if I posted one I would delete it after ten lost followers. It has never been about the number rather than disapproval from society that used to like me. But let’s be frank here, reality is never what it is. Reality is a reflection of our inner state. So when I say “inspiring bloggers” I actually mean slim girls with perfect shapes and great style. These are the girls I consciously decided to follow and see every day in my feed. However, initial idea to keep myself motivated by surrounding with perfect pictures had one huge side effect. Even more disappointment in myself. I could not loose weight at the pace I wished, my skin did not get better and even more and more followers unsubscribed. It felt like I will never get there and that was right. I will never get there because I am not them and will never be able to walk their shoes. Yet one day some random person told me “it’s easy for you, look how beautiful you are. I wish I could be the same”.
Do you know how sobering it was? For sure there are always several directions to go about situation and I could say “my aspiration is greater than yours” instead I decided to value more of who I am. No, I haven’t stopped to work on myself using “I love myself the way I am” excuse. On contrary, I put even more effort into that. Yet I stopped comparing myself to anyone. I love my shoes and I love walking in them. It’s not always easy but being your own motivation eliminated all redundant noise. You can look up to seven billion people in the World but that won’t get you to the place where you want to be.
So if everything is so individual what does the real beauty entail to me? Three words: love, bravery and confidence.
Love to yourself and others. These people have some special glow. Even when exhausted they smile with that beautiful gleam. Their love is a beginning to everything. They accept people with love yet love themselves enough to stay away from harm and not to harm others. They care about themselves deeply. They keep their body heathy yet don’t punish themselves for having a sweat treat. Their love is nurtured with honesty about who they are and what they represent.
Brave people belong to a special breed. They are not afraid to be misread or not to fit in. They are fearless and chase new experiences. These people let the world come in. Try it out and never afraid to let it go. The true beauty is that after their touch world is never the same. Brave people are not afraid to gamble themselves not because they don’t know their worth exactly opposite. They are certain they will never loose themselves.
This trait leaves goosebumps on my skin. Confident people are like caravels, gracious, furious and mindful. It has nothing to do with arrogance. It is something so deep that even without words they win your trust. Is it magic? Oh no, perhaps just a pinch. They trust themselves and lead others by example.
So what if you did not find yourself in these boxes? Would I find you ugly? Please scroll up and remind yourself that reality is what we project on this World. We both will see things differently. But summarising all these points, the real beauty for me lays beyond justification. It is about accepting who you are, challenging it and creating a better version of yourself every day.
Am I there?
I am on my way and these photos are quite a step for me. A year ago I would be shame to pose in front of the camera and go public with the outcome. That’s not my working pose. It’s not a standard smile that looks good and has been tested before. This is something different. Same as this outfit. What some might find boring for me is a step away from a conservative black dresses. I guess there is no wonder my t-shirt says “be brave”. Even though I bought it just because it looked cool. Yet would it be if I did not believe in that?
To add a pinch of cheesiness to this post, let me end by saying… If you haven’t loved yourself today, please do. You were made for it.
pants & t-shirt: Monki; shoes: Ekonika; nailpolish: Tom Ford; lipstic: Kiko